Suburban Insanity

I just got hit up for the third time in three years for money to pay for a new Middle School band shirt. When I was in school band in the 1960’s and 1970’s, we wore our Sunday clothes to the two band concerts per year. This created a certain excitement as well as a very festive air. Here in Gwinnett County suburbs, the children must all buy an article of apparel so they all look the same playing their instruments in the gym for the spring and winter concerts. In my sister’s elementary school, in a very affluent suburb on Long Island, the children wear white shirts or blouses and black pants that they own. Why is it necessary for me to pay $80 for clothing that my child will wear for a total of 9 hours, or 3 hours per year? Would anyone be offended if the children in the band were not wearing matching outfits?

When I was in High School and on Varsity Gymnastics, the warm up suits were on loan for the season and returned at the end of the year. I guess that sounds disgusting to a lot of today’s parents. Today heaven help your pocketbook if your daughter makes the cheerleading squad! In fact, in many of the local high schools, the athletes are required to purchase a new uniform each year, even it still fits them and is identical to the one worn the year before.

Often a fundraiser is hidden into the price charged to the parents. It is common knowledge that a tee shirt can be purchased these days for only $2-$3. Yet we don’t cringe when asked to pay $10 for the group’s tee shirt. Be assured that your organization is pocketing the difference.

For many years my sons played Little League baseball. The team uniforms were included in the $150 we paid to join the league with the exception of the pants. The Team Mom always decided that the boys needed fancy pants: those with a double stripe down the side cost $24 a pair as opposed to $12 for plain, non-striped ones. Guess which ones our boys always wore? Guess how long these pants looked good? A lot of parents jump at the chance to open their wallets for the “embroidered name on baseball cap” option. After all when Johnny makes the Majors, his embroidered caps will be worth a fortune. Don't forget the all stars name-embroidered baseball bags too.

Don’t even get me started on the $275 I paid for uniform pieces that my son wore for 3 All-Star games. We needed a home jersey, an away jersey, a practice jersey, UnderArmour (only the brand name would do) and last but not least, the ever-necessary tee shirt with all the boys' names on the back.

Buying personalized apparel for every activity has become the mentality this decade in the suburbs. I feel it is out-of-hand, yet I am powerless to change it. Parents have to eventually realize that their materialistic priorities are totally out of whack. The children certainly don't appreciate it and why should they? It's not special, it's commonplace. Say something about it and risk being called “low-income” and receiving offers of financial assistance. Parents who have lots of disposable income seem to also have the free time to run the committees that are in charge of determining what constitutes necessities. While it is great that they volunteer for these committees, I think the majority of these people are out of touch with the meaning of a dollar. As much as I would enjoy spoiling my kids with personalized, expensive articles of clothing, I am trying to save for their college educations. Call me old- fashioned, but a 7- ear old will ruin those fancy pants in the first game and will be on 15 more sports teams in his youth and does not NEED his name embroidered on his cap. But heaven help the parent who speaks out about these luxury items, which have become considered necessities. So today I shell out another $20 for yet another piece of personalized apparel that is going to wind up with 100’s of others on the Goodwill rack.